In two weeks, as NBC announced yesterday, 30 Rock will go down that road that many on-their-way-out comedies have gone before, celebrating a long-awaited milestone of one of the central characters. Liz Lemon, who for years has been revered across the Internet as Our Lady of the Young and Single, Patron Saint of Sandwiches, is getting hitched, to happy-go-lucky hot dog truck owner Criss Chros (James Marsden). As far as Liz’s boyfriends have gone, Criss isn’t the most interesting but is one of the more likable, and it should be a decent Very Special Episode.
Naturally, we have a few rather baseless, general predictions of what will happen in the 30 Rock wedding episode, in case you wanted to play Bingo or turn it into a drinking game or something like that.
- At least one of Liz’s ex-boyfriends returns. It will probably be beeper king Dennis Duffy but here’s hoping it will be Jon Hamm’s hook-handed Dr. Drew.
- Jenna sings. Multiple times.
- Jenna is embroiled in some bridesmaid/Maid of Honor-related conflict.
- Jenna threatens to commit suicide at the wedding as a result of said conflict.
- Criss’ name is misspelled on at least one wedding sign or invitation—but not in the way you would think! Maybe "Cris" or "Chirs" or something.
- Liz and Jack banter about whether or not Liz will be keeping her own name.
- Jack gets into Liz’s head somehow and almost inadvertently breaks up the wedding.
- Liz wears her TGS hoodie until right before she walks down the aisle.
- Liz walks down the aisle to some old but recognizable NBC TV show theme, maybe Family Ties or Mad About You.
- In a homage to a previous wedding episode in which she tried to stall for time by reading random scriptures, Liz accidentally chooses a rather bizarre biblical passage—one involving lots of concubines or maybe that part of Leviticus that says you’re not allowed to eat shrimp.
- Hazel Wassername attempts to thwart the wedding in a particularly garish manner, possibly involving an explosion.
- Jack opens up to Kenneth about his crippling loneliness as he sees Liz Lemon in a happy relationship. Scotch follows.
- At least one "Lemon Party" joke for good measure.
- Frank has a wedding-focused hat slogan, possibly having to do with copulating with one of the bridesmaids.
- Liz announces her pregnancy because dammit this show is going to go down in a blaze of glory.