The Perfect Cover Songs for Adam Lambert’s Debut

Technically, three fey butterflies remain in the running to win Simon Cowell's stony, but tender affection American Idol. We can assure that America's lost interest in Danny Gokey and that other dude, having effectively shot darts through their crepe-thin wings. Because none of them wear guy-liner. Jerks. Even Cowell's singled out his future Leona Lewis in the feyest of them all: Adam Lambert. Maybe on cold lonely nights in his mansion, Cowell might prod another log onto the roaring fire and sip some scotch. Then he'll turn to look up at the probable Idol winner in a mischievous way that the ancient Greeks would know well. Lambert will smile, then go on to sing his heart out with Boylesean grandeur. Cowell, in a rare moment of vulnerability, will dab a velvet handkerchief to blot away something resembling a tear. Or perhaps this is just what Cowell and crew want us to believe. Which isn't a hard thing to do, as we're all equally enamored with this particular butterfly anyway.

Mostly because—bar Kelly Clarkson, who’s looking Jessica Simpson-esque these days—we’re all kinda hard-pressed to recall any champ who’s gone on to accomplish more than the “American” part of the show’s namesake. Lambert’s crooning (and more importantly, his extensive make-up regimen) look to pave a prodigious pop road with glitter for the fey songster. But obviously, he’ll need a little help. With Idol being a show that creates musicians’ careers based on how well they perform cover songs, what do-overs can ensure extended operation of the Adam Lambert Hit Factory for days to come? After all, it’s how Cowell’s previous pet safeguarded her initial victory.

● “Come To My Window” by Melissa Etheridge. Adam Lambert doing Melissa Etheridge could be a good thing. Like he proved with his Led Zep cover, Lambert’s got a vicious rock snarl that could work well with this particular song. Also, the dichotomous gay-lesbian curveball will ensure frothing media hysteria for not only days, but weeks on end!

● “Instant Pleasure” by Rufus Wainwright. When Lambert does get around to releasing his debut, lazy journalists/broke Lamberters seeking advance copies will probably lob in some kind of erroneous allusion like, “My, my, isn’t Adam Lambert the new Rufus Wainwright!” They’ll mean to draw parallels between the whole riding in cars with boys thing, but not the piano thing. To appease them, Lambert should pilfer this staple from Wainwright’s oeuvre—a song that he’s said he feels totally disconnected from. Also: It does not feature a piano

● “Kids In America” by Kim Wilde. It’s a simple concept. Lambert and his axed Idol brethren and sistren, are kids—wait for it—in America! Plus, the potential for a crappy Ford-sponsored tie-in is golden.

● “With Or Without You” by U2. Since everyone’s still raving about how he killed last night, performing U2’s “One,” it’s sensible to toss him another U2 song. Preferably one that doesn’t suck, which means nothing from after 1995. Even if you abhor his Christian Siriano-influenced methods of hair care, you’ve got to admit, he doesn’t even slightly ding the top-notch tribute.

● “Confide In Me” by Kylie Minogue. For well-documented reasons like this, you can imagine La Lambert swinging open the doors of his mother’s expansive armoire, jumping out, and singing this particular Kylie Minogue song. And for that reason and his keffiyeh-wrapped delivery of Johnny Cash, this particular cover would and should go over solidly.