Good morning. It's New Year's Eve. Isn't it understood that nothing of great importance should happen today, such as mass murders or political coups or celebrity deaths? Then why, oh why, would today be the day that we learn of that Kanye West and Kim Kardashian are expecting a child?

Yes, West announced the news last night at a concert in Atlantic City. Goddamn him. Sure, I bet he's pleased as punch, as is Kim, no doubt, who has probably already started shopping for the little one, but won't they think of the poor bloggers scrambling around this morning, taking screenshots of celebrity tweets in a rushed effort to come up with ten or so reactions from B- and C-list celebrities, wishing the young couple their own congratulations and somehow lodging themselves into this story? 

Don't they have any care or thought about us?

God, I can't wait to drink all of the champagne. 


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