As Portfolio's Jeff Bercovici points out, mean Maureen Dowd -- stout though bloodless defender of Caroline Kennedy for Senate -- laughed in the face of the recession, New York Times budget/expense account cuts, and the tense-backed everywhere by visiting Miami's Canyon Ranch spa. This is easily among the best/worst things the Times has ever put into print. Follow us as we follow Maureen through a magical beach resort vacation of Faux White Upper-Class Guilt and Exotic Oils! Whee!