New York's worst attractions and better ideas.

There's a huge segment of people that aren't going to give a shit which way the wind blows come Sunday's Super Bowl: anyone who isn't a Cardinals fan (they have fans that aren't Will Leitch?), anyone who isn't a Steelers fan (they have fans that aren't Obama?), anyone who doesn't watch football, anyone who doesn't have money on these games, anyone who doesn't understand football, anybody who'd rather be having brunch at Balthazar, and ... essentially, much of New York. Yet, because New Yorkers are trained monkeys who invest in rituals -- or because they don't want to spend Sunday afternoon alone -- they're going to have to make their way out of the apartment at some point to get some Super Bowl action in. That being said, if you've got to go, go right -- here, we present our favorite places to "watch" the Super Bowl that aren't insufferable sports bars.