Snake on a plane! A Delaware man was arrested for doing it with himself on a Southwest Airlines flight from Philly to Denver. The Smoking Gun obtained an criminal complaint alleging that 34-year-old computer programmer Murali Nookella was fiddling around in his underwear beneath a blanket pulled up to his waist. The unnamed woman seated next to him said his eyes were closed, when she began to see movement under the blanket. When she got up to change seats, she saw him holding his erect penis.

Uh Oh. Actor-Director Kevin Smith was removed from a Southwest flight Saturday for being too fat, and then Smith took out the Twitter gun. To fly from Oakland to Burbank, he purchased two tickets, in accordance with the airline's "Guidelines for Customers of Size" which states "Customers who are unable to lower both armrests and/or who compromise any portion of adjacent seating should proactively book the number of seats needed prior to travel." He then tried to hop on an earlier flight standby, but that flight had only one seat for him. So, Southwest removed him from the plane. Smith was none too happy about this and raged on via Twitter.

Southwest threw the first punch in this round, lowering prices to a ridiculous $25 a seat in their football-themed "4th Quarter Sale." If you're flying distances under 374 miles -- like, say from Los Angeles to Las Vegas or Los Angeles to San Francisco -- it's really only $25 each way. Prices go up in mile increments, so it's $50 from Los Angeles to Reno, $75 to Salt Lake City, and then $100 to New Orleans or Chicago.

Southwest Airlines knows a marketable trend when they see one on their Twitter and stuff. Hence their new eco-plane (well, it's actually four years old, but it's eco-ness is new). The aircraft's first greeny flight was Wednesday evening, tracking a route from headquarters in Dallas up to rainy Seattle. The plane is not fueled by natural gas, like the eco-plane from Qatar; its environmental makeover is, sadly, entirely cosmetic.

Labor Day has come and gone, taking with it all the white clothes (and shoes) and most of the fanfare of lazy summer days. However, summer isn't officially, officially over until September 21 -- even though Starbucks is already trotting out that damn Pumpkin Spice Latte. In case you didn't get a chance to get away for the long weekend, or in case you did and it was such a blast you need a vacation from your vacation, you're in luck. My favorite trifecta of airlines all launched sales this week, designed to inspire travel lust in those hoping for a last weekend fling, or those ready to plan fall trips already.

Southwest Airlines is sure toeing the line in regards to their "no hidden fees" promise. They've now added a fee to their check-in process that, although not mandatory, might as well be. However, if the fee does what it promises, I'd be happy to cough up the $10 they're asking for the "EarlyBird Check-in" . This new fee allows passengers to board immediately after Southwest’s Business Select and Rapid Rewards A-List customers, meaning no rushing to wait in the A/B/C lines. As it stands now, if you want to coveted "A" boarding line -- for those of you not familiar with the fun cattle call that can be Southwest flying -- there are no assigned seating, and so the earlier you check in, the better your chances are for getting a non-middle seat.

Worse than snakes on a plane, some scorpions hitched a ride on a recent Southwest flight from Phoenix headed to Indianapolis (where were you on this one, TSA?). Seems that an entire family of little stingers took nest in Doug Herbstommer's carry-on luggage. Mid-flight, one of the scorpions made a break for it and ended up falling on Herbstommer, who initially thought the creature was an errant seatbelt. The arachnid in question quickly scurried up Herbstommer's pant leg (my own personal nightmare, BTW) who then tried to brush the "seatbelt" off and got stung between his fingers. Fortunately the scorpion was of the Arizona Bark varietal, whose stings rarely cause death. The errant scorpion met his maker shortly thereafter, courtesy of Herbstommer's flip flop.

Southwest Airlines has a sweet sale going on that ends today at midnight. The flights on sale are all fall flights, so think fall foliage, or alternately, places that will still be warm enough to eke out a last few days of bathing-suit wear. Note the sale ends just before the holiday season starts, but if you can take a week off for Thanksgiving, now would be an excellent time to book. Sale flights start September 9 and stop November 18. Several choice deals still available.