● Abercrombie & Fitch is offering to pay Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino to not wear their merchandise. "We understand that the show is for entertainment purposes, but believe this association is contrary to the aspirational nature of our brand, and may be distressing to many of our fans,” said the company of their proposed "Win-Win Situation." [Speakeasy/WSJ] ● Television shrink Dr. Phil has won the sure-to-be-teary first interview with Casey Anthony's parents. [Washington Post] ● Taylor Momsen has officially quit acting in order to make more time for her music, which is "pretty much all [she wants] to do" anyways. [Elle]

● Selena Gomez checked into a hospital complaining of "nausea and a severe headache" after her appearance on The Tonight Show. Jay Leno gives us migraines, too. #getwellsoonselena [DailyMail] ● Last night was a big one for live-tweet aficionados: there were a lot of theater jokes, a lot of basketball jokes, and a lot of jokes about all the bad jokes. The Book of Mormon won nine Tonys, and on the court, the Mavericks beat Lebron James and the Miami Heat, taking home their first championship trophy (and some cool wide-brims). [NYT/NYT] ● Demi Lovato's worst-life-ever continues, with her mom now in rehab and her boyfriend, Wilmer Valderrama, now her ex. Sometimes things don't get better... [Page Six]

Last fall, after flipping off most of the Upper East Side, Gossip Girl’s Taylor Momsen toured the country in support of Light Me Up, her surprisingly accomplished debut album with The Pretty Reckless. Well, yesterday it was confirmed that Momsen (and former costar Jessica Szohr) won't be returning to the show that made her famous enough to have a music career in the first place. Now that she's a full-time rock star, we wanted to find out how she likes life on the road. Let’s just say, Little J. wouldn’t last an hour.

● The new Duke and Duchess of Cambridge are on their honeymoon right now, on an island somewhere surrounded by coconut groves. Where are you? [DailyMail] ● After 25 years of marriage, Arnold Schwarzennegger and Maria Shriver have separated. Shriver's moving out of their Brentwood mansion while they "work on the future of [their] relationship". [LA Times] ● Whitney Houston has voluntarily returned to rehab, purportedly as part of a "long-standing" recovery process. [AP/Yahoo]

What luck! In a week that turned out to be all about the kill, we're introducing our brand new Music Issue on newsstands now, featuring cover stars The Kills. Coincidence? We think so! Anyway, read all about the everlasting musical union between Mr. Hince and Ms. Mosshart -- and the new album they made -- here. Also in our May issue:

After a year of questionable tabloid headlines and papparazzi pics of scandalous outfits, Taylor Momsen should not be surprised at all to hear that she’s not the ideal face for a teen clothing brand, even if it is run by Madonna. The pet project of Madge and Lourdes, Material Girl, is a budget fashion line sold at Macy’s, with most items ranging from $12 to $40, and Momsen has served as the label’s spokesmodel since launching last summer, until now.

Gossip girl-cum-trashtastic rocker Taylor Momsen has managed to book two large print campaigns this year: first Madonna's Material Girl line for Macy's and now John Galliano's fragrance ads. This week her photos for Galliano’s Parlez-Moi d’Amour fragrance were released, complete with her signature raccoon-painted eyes and lingerie-inspired wardrobe. More Galliano x Momsen after the jump.

Time Magazine has added to the end of year best-of lists, with their Top 10 Fashion Statements of 2010. This is not a list of impeccable style, no, but instead individuals who gave us pause to ask the question: “What is she wearing!?” Ranking at number one is Lady Gaga and her now infamous meat dress—with shoes, hat, and purse to match.

● Katy Perry and Russel Brand were married on Saturday in India in front of two elephants, a drum troupe, and hopefully a divorce attorney taking notes, just in case. [People] ● Seventeen-year-old Taylor Momsen flashed the crowd while performing with her band The Pretty Reckless, surprising exactly one person, probably named Dad. [Hollywood Life] ● Leaked gossip about Mick Jagger, from Keith Richards' upcoming autobiography, includes news of his diva tendencies, confusion about Johnny Depp, and his "tiny todger." [Daily Mail]

● Kim Kardashian, who entered the public consciousness via sex tape and Playboy spread, is "really upset" about new photos that expose her body. [RadarOnline] ● James Franco, ever the enigma, is not a gay stoner. Or is he? [The Advocate] ● Twlight: Eclipse will be released again this weekend because it is Bella Swan's birthday. Since it is not actually about money, the showings are free, right? Right? [Deadline]