Now that Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has wrapped up spewing his hilarious bile all over an empty UN general assembly, an important question remains: What's he doing tonight? You don't make the long trek to New York all the way from Iran and not sample a taste of our legendary nightlife. So what does he do? Loiter outside the Gansevoort and blend in with a crew of other blazer-sporting, open-collar-shirted loudmouths? Or does he charm his way in to a private event so he can catch those MisShapes he's been hearing so much about? Even if we don't agree with everything he says, we still want him to have fun. Because if anyone needs to loosen up, it's that guy.

● Zum Schneider (East Village) - New-school Teutonic brings Oktoberfest in July. And also October! Live oompah and DJ four nights a week, with Mösl Franzi and the Ja Ja Jas. Oktoberfest specials to wet your whistle. ● Loreley (Lower East Side) - Industrial entrance on Rivington backwater leads to rollicking little biergarten. Pours ‘em like they do in Cologne, knock back a few Gaffel Kölsch or Reissdorf Kölsch and you'll be wondering where you left your backpack with the hostel address in it. Seasonal brews and food specials mark the Oktoberfest season. ● Blaue Gans (Tribeca) - The Gutenbrunner Austrian Empire creeps further downtown via charming “Blue Goose." Celebrate the season with heavy-duty special brews from Munich, plus sauerbraten, sausages, and ginormous pretzels.

Director & star on their sci-fi psyche-out

Happy birthday, Boss! BlackBook executive editor Chris Mohney is a cringeworthy 38 yearsold today! [You're certainly right on the cringing part. -CM] He spends his days supervising the efforts of trained monkeys (fellow blogger Ben Barna and myself), strenuously trying to avoid any events that would call for either of us to be shot dead. After work, Chris goes home to exert influence on The Littlest Mohney to be nothing like us. But we want to take him out to celebrate! So: where do you take your married, with-child 38 year-old boss out for his birthday? Answers after the jump.

10. Jeremy’s Ale House (Lower Manhattan) - Not the greenest option, but when it comes to price, there’s no arguing with their $4 32-ounce Styrofoam buckets of Coors. 9. Zum Schneider (East Village) - It’s Oktoberfest all-year-round at this frat-tastic joint where the impressive beer selection comes in small 0.3l, regular 0.5l, or large 1.0l glasses. 8. Heidelberg (Upper East Side) - Nothing like drinking two liters of beer out of a glass boot.