Writer/director Rodrigo García's latest, Mother and Child hits theaters Friday, and follows the mostly painful, but sometimes celebratory affects of adoption on three women played by Annette Bening, Naomi Watts and Kerry Washington. Bening shines as Karen, who, as a middle-aged social introvert, still lives with and cares for her mother. The film opens with Karen at 14 canoodling with her adolescent love, Tom. Soon after, she becomes pregnant and is forced into a program for teen mothers who plan to give their children up for adoption. Fast forward thirty years, and Karen is still lamenting the loss of her daughter, writing her letters and trying to reach out to the child she never knew. She meets Paco (Jimmy Smits), the sexy, mysterious new guy at her physical therapy practice and finally starts to break out of her shell of self-pity and confusion. Here, the legendary actress takes an in-depth look at her complicated role.

What was your initial impression of your character, Karen, when you read the script? I ached for her as I was reading it, but I was fascinated and I loved the range of the story— how many people Rodrigo Garcia was following and how many people he was taking us into the lives of. I looked at [the script] and part of me thought, “Oh. I know who these people are.” Then, as the story went on, I thought, “Wait. I don’t actually know who this person is.” Continually there were little revelations that begin to add up to deeply perceptive moments that reveal so much about character and people. That was in the writing. I found myself very involved in the end and relieved, especially for Karen, because there’s a lot of pain at the beginning and obviously, unhappiness. She’s just not able to connect. She’s just not good at it and gets things wrong. I wanted better for her.

Let’s talk a little bit about that pain that she exhibits in the beginning. At first, it seems like it stems from the absence of her daughter. Then, after her mother passes, she undergoes a huge transformation, maybe because her mother had been controlling her life. What did you think? I think it’s all of those things. From what I’ve been able to see so far in my life and in watching life around me, it’s always a combination of things. For Karen, accidentally getting pregnant at 14 and being so ashamed and the circumstances where there was just no question that she would have to give up the baby. Can you imagine getting pregnant and going through childbirth as a child? A lot of these girls were alone in the delivery room. They had the doctors there, but they had no one to help them. People talk about signing the baby away. Karen brings all of that to the moment and that’s a reason why she’s so cut off. I was very interested in that. I began to get really intrigued with trying to find those moments. You never know when you’re working if you’re finding them which is why it’s so ironic to be sitting here and talking about it. But, in the moment, one is thinking, “Did I find those?” This movie has so many intricate brush strokes! Most of them are just closely observed, nuanced moments between people that Rodrigo writes and you’re trying to find those.

Jimmy Smits' character tries so hard to befriend Karen, but she’s so introverted and awkward and hard to break. What was it like to pull into that bubble of social ineptitude, like the scene in the diner? I loved shooting that scene. I was trying very hard to find a woman who was real. So, there was nothing embellished. She’s the person you meet on the street, in the grocery store. I don’t know if I can articulate it, but I just saw this person who was very, very real. I just thought that was the way he’d written her. A lot of acting just comes back to the writing and what is presented to you. I knew the writing was good so I had to get out of the way of that and let the writing tell the story. Like all the characters you play as an actor, you fall in love with them. She wants so much to connect and she just wants to have a date. She wants to function like a normal person the way the rest of the world does, but she can’t. A lot of people feel that way. It’s not that they don’t want to connect, it’s that they -- for whatever reason—have lost the ability. She says the wrong thing. As the story goes on, she begins to know that she’s saying the wrong thing, but sometimes, she doesn’t even know it. She just says it and I like that. I find that very endearing in her, especially, because she changes. If that’s all it was, it wouldn’t be fun.

How did this film make you reflect on your own role as a mother? All day long, every day it comes into play. The work that you do affects you and the relationships around you—with your parents, your boyfriend, your girlfriend, your lover, or in my case, your children. I like that about the work that I do. It’s all symbiotic, and one is always affecting the other. It’s funny; I think that one of the pleasures of working is that it sharpens the mind. When I think closely about what that experience would have been like… I didn’t go through what Karen went through. So, what does that feel like? What does that feel like in your gut? Then, I’m trying to find a way to make that come alive. I loved that process and that’s being a mom. It’s all interwoven. I don’t know if that makes any sense, but it’s all part of the same thing. It’s not like: here’s work and here’s life. One begins to get so involved that it does become personal. That’s the privilege of the work and that’s what I’ve been doing. Then, you let it go, hopefully. Or you’re insane which would not be good.

There’s a particular sadness in Karen meeting up with her old love, Tom. That was an unexpected turn in the plot. I know! I loved that. It made perfect sense to me. I loved that character in her middle age. She couldn’t be anything but her middle age. What she’s doing, being at this stage of life and having enough life experience where you really can look back. As she said in the script, she saw him once and didn’t have the guts to say, “Oh my god! Hello.” Later, she finds that and there’s something in her that’s driving her to get rid of the baggage. Also, it’s David Morse and he’s an incredible actor. I was so grateful that it was him. He has such a sense of history about him. There’s something about past relationships, too, even in teen years. That person inhabits a part of you that nothing else ever touches. It’s a kind of experience you have with one other person that are totally unique. Obviously, theirs was so loaded – having gone through [having a child], then, having been ripped apart from each other. Although it’s not what the story’s about, it also made me think a lot about the boys who were in that situation -- the guys who got the girls pregnant. There was a lot of shame on the girl. But nobody knew who the guys were. Nothing was talked about. There was no sort of healthy airing of feelings, however difficult the feelings may have been. All of that came into play for me in terms of that episode where she goes and finds him.

What is your favorite place in the world? I did a picture there many years ago in Budapest, Hungary and got to live there. It was extraordinary. When I came back to Budapest, they had opened the most beautiful Four Seasons hotel at the foot of the Chain Bridge. I got to stay there. They converted one of the most beautiful art nouveau buildings in all of Europe. So, it’s this old, gorgeous building sitting at the foot of one of the most famous, beautiful bridges on the Danube. That was one of the most amazing places I’ve ever been!