I used to have a friend who was a lot like Courteney Cox's character on Cougar Town (which bows tonight on ABC) minus that girlishly neurotic/rockin' the suburbs/sexy divorcée vibe, plus the sleazy mack-on-impressionable college girls vibe. He used to frequent Williamsburg bars to that end. We don't really talk anymore now. But it is odd that we're all so quick to jump the gun and castigate Cox when really olds having been preying on youngs since the dawn of time, and it's mostly because she's a lady whose personal storyline most of the Western world is having trouble with. Or it could be the sneak peeks at the trailer. Either way, wolves, badgers, Donald Trump, and cougars have all been part of this tenuous food chain for ages. What's more problematic for me is that by singling out Zac Efron as her ideal prey, Cox will have to fight Perez Hilton for leftovers.

Because I'm afraid of thinking about how Perez would devour Cox whole like Monstro the Whale, let's instead dwell on how correct Cox is. She argues, "Let's face it, Zac Efron would be perfect." Although dropping out of the Footloose remake may hurt him more than his overconfidence. "But he probably has too much confidence to be real prey for a cougar."

But you know who, then, could fill Efron's ballet flats pretty easily? Chace Crawford, who not only replaced Efron in said Footloose do-over but also has previous experience with cougars.