Remember when Bill Murray was spotted boozing around greater Bushwick with confused girls a third his age? It seems Sean Penn is experiencing a similar mania, no doubt influenced by similar insecurities. You'll remember: Murray, during the hoopla around Lost In Translation, was mortified to see The Lord of the Rings strut off with every Oscar that perhaps otherwise should've gone to his film. And now, a few years later, he's coping by partying in the sweaty, close-quarters PBR-chugging company of art school grads (not that such company is a bad thing). And yet, there lies a parallel between Murray's way of dealing with award show trauma and Penn's.

In the face of overwhelming award show defeat by Slumdog Millionaire, Penn may be experiencing similar feelings of inadequacy. Although he's not parading his problems through the streets of a working class Hispanic neighborhood, how else to explain his sidling up next to thesps like Lindsay Lohan and more recently, Katie Holmes? While some actors react to perceived awards season injustices by seeking more impossibly esoteric roles or leaving the profession entirely, Penn's unique crisis management skills may be met with resistance from Sam Ronson or Tom Cruise, both quite capable of manic fits of their own. But should he stay the course with LiLo and KaHo, Penn would be wise to learn to defend himself against lesbians and Xenu enthusiasts alike, as both factions are frequently noted for their mob mentalities.