Let's look at the bright side before we willingly throw ourselves under the runaway bus that is Tiger Woods' lack of discretion. As proved by many a Details coverguy and Chris Brown for Vibe, some splinter of print media desperately wants to reward blundering men for their poor life choices. When Woods readies himself for his triumphant comeback, he'll no doubt have magazines at his beck and call, all wanting to land him for a cover and present the "Exclusive Tiger Woods" story. And while Woods hasn't made a reputation as an outspoken asshat, it takes some degree of asshattery not only to cheat on your wife with nearly a dozen other women, but to get caught. But for every towering presence that topples, ten small personae must rise. And Tiger's Ten is a rundown of fameball femmes who not only have the magic to tame the golfer's disco stick, but the patience required in order to break their silence for maximum effect.

1. Rachel Uchitel. Of the ten, probably the quickest to provide a smart, steely defense.

2. Jaimee Grubbs. You may recall Jaimee Grubbs. If we were to chart each of these broads on an elaborate graph, from CLASSY to NASTY, Grubb's would obviously mark the nadir of NASTY.

3. Kalika Moquin. The third woman in Woods' harem, it's likely they found each other via MySpace. Here is a picture of Moquin looking how Woods' wife Elin Nordegren must've when all of this unsavory news started spilling forth.

4. Jamie Jungers. In all fairness, if Woods and Jungers were acting out selected scenes from The Joy Luck Club, the a noted model he picked up at a party, would play the part of his accursed fourth wife.

5. Mindy Lawton. Aaand another waitress! Lawton apparently did the dirty with Woods in places like car parks and a shower while Nordegren was pregnant with the couple's first child. She also alleged that Woods was well-endowed.

6. Cori Rist. Rist has a 7-year-old son and supposedly met Woods at Butter.

7. Holly Sampson. Really, Tiger's Ten would be just appalling without the obligatory porn star.

8. TK. With these last three, it gets nebulous. Occupations, but no names. Woods' eighth mistress was with a cocktail mistress, initially sparked at The Roxy in Orlando.

9. TK. A "sexy" British TV presenter, apparently, who was single during the affair, but has since married. Please, god, don't let it be Charlotte Church.

10. TK. A nymphomaniacal cougar makes ten for Tiger, then.