Yesterday at Southby brought sunshine and sound at an accelerated pace. After an annoyingly long bus ride into town, I stopped into Which Wich and saw a girl attempting to call a cab. We realized we were going to the same place, so when a cab failed to materialize, we shared one of those ridiculous bike powered tourist conveyance devices over to the French Legation Museum. Eating a delicious sandwich with the wind in my hair as a sweaty man pedaled me to a resplendent French mansion made me feel like Cleopatra, or at least Liz Lemon's fantasy version of her.

“We're about to live through one of the worst filmmaking decades all over again,” writes Gina Piccalo in The Daily Beast today. That decade – the ‘80s – is back in full force with a flood of remakes (Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps, Clash of the Titans, Tron Legacy, The Karate Kid, A Nightmare on Elm Street, Predators, and Red Dawn, among others) and “brand-new films with plots so stale they feel as if they've been unearthed from some jaundiced Reagan-era slush pile.” (Piccalo mentions The Bounty Hunter, Did You Hear About the Morgans? and Cop Out as prime examples).

The end of the world is looming in the distant future. No, it’s not the apocalypse we’re referring to… it's Sarah Palin making her way to reality TV and demanding $1 million+ per episode. Sarah Palin will soon be a must-see train wreck on cable. Sarah Palin will have her opinion voiced on television. Before long, viewers will be quoting “Palinisms” around the office water cooler. Sure, sure, it's not so severe, since Palin’s been pitching a project called Sarah Palin's Alaska, which is obviously worth a cool mil per viewing. If this doesn't pan out for the former Alaskan Governor, here are some concepts for current and resurrected reality gems that Mme. Palin should take into consideration, after the jump.

It was only a matter of time. Lady Gaga is being sued – and not for small change. Producer and ex-boyfriend Rob Fusari has slapped Gaga with a $30 million lawsuit, claiming he rescued the singer from “guidette” obscurity and helped shape her into the dance beat, post-pop master she is today. He co-wrote hits “Paparazzi” and “Disco Heaven,” claims to have given Gaga her name ["One day when Fusari addressed a cell phone text to Germanotta under the moniker 'Radio Gaga' his cell phone's spell check converted 'Radio' to 'Lady'," the suit says. "Germanotta loved it and 'Lady Gaga' was born."], and credits himself with getting her the industry’s most elusive and well-lusted after prize – a major label record deal.

Earlier this week Kristen Stewart and Dakota Fanning, the stars of the Joan Jett-Cherie Currie biopic The Runaways, sat down with a room full of journalists to talk about the film. Here are the best parts of the round table discussion.

Excepting maybe jodhpurs or a bullhorn, there’s no more representative object associated with movie sets than the clapboard, or “slate,” as it’s sometimes called. Used either at the beginning or the end of every take, its purpose is to assist in syncing up sound and picture, as well as to identify each shot and take for editing purposes. There’s nothing especially artful in this; it's simply a functional tool in the larger film-making apparatus—or so I thought until I stumbled upon a clip reel of the slates from Quentin Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds. In it, the clapboard operator calls out the shot and take, but in each case uses the letter code as an opportunity for a shout-out, gag, or a sly comment (for example, “10 AN” becomes “10 Achtung Nazis.”) Although I could see how it might throw off some of the talent trying to get into character, the bits are pretty damn funny, and give just a little bit of an idea as to what kind of atmosphere Tarantino cultivates on his sets. Video after the jump.

● Sandra Bullock's husband Jesse James has apologized to his Oscar-winning wife after reports surfaced that while Bullock was playing a southern, Republican-friendly mother in The Blind Side, he was getting it in with a woman who has tattoos everywhere, including her forehead. How can you even compete with that, really? [HuffPo]
● The man who assassinated Malcolm X, Thomas Hagan, has been paroled and will be released from jail on April 28. Lil Wayne and Gucci Mane, though, are still behind bars. [Village Voice]
● Lewis Carroll's original version of Alice in Wonderland, handwritten and complete with illustrations, is available for viewing online. [British Library]

Southby (or, as really cool people call it, "sss") has just started but it already seems like I've been at it forever. I feel like Link must feel hauling his pixelated ass all over the world of Zelda, except instead of some lame medallion, I am collecting free drinks and pleasing sonic experiences. I decided to "take it easy" the first day, which meant waiting until 1pm to start drinking and getting from show to show by walking instead of my usual jog.

We can't say this surprises us. The reviews popping up for Bounty Hunter are terrible. But also, they're great. Great because they prove our theory that Gerard Butler is in the wrong profession. Great because it brings us one step closer to the abolition of the genre (now all we need is a crappy opening weekend). Great because after Love Happens and now this, Jennifer Aniston might start taking herself seriously. And most of all, great because it's way more fun to hear critics tear into a movie than praise it. After the jump, some of the best jibes.

● In awesome potential collaboration news, Quentin Tarantino wants to work with Lady Gaga. And some dogs who dress like her. [Daily Express, Buzzfeed]
● Charlotte Bronte was a babysitter: Famous author’s dayjobs. [Lapham’s Quarterly]
● “I personally only like high-class escorts.” Thus spoke Karl Lagerfeld. [Vice]