My first New York Fashion Week kicked off last night atChristie's in midtown. An old university chum of mine passed along an invite to the auction house's evening to "celebrate fashion week and a private preview of Christie’s fall sales of post war & contemporary art, impressionist & modern art and Resurrection: Avant-Garde Fashion." What I loved best about this party was that if I wanted to avoid an awkward encounter (with Emma Snowdon-Jones), or ran out of things to say, or if I simply had no one to talk to, there was a whole rack of art and fashion I could pretend to be interested in while planning my next move.

Five minutes until I interview Albert Hammond Jr. Turn on his new album. Como Te Llama? is great. Variety, clever lyrics. Squeeze an unlit cigarette between my fingers. I wonder if he smokes? Marlboros probably. No, focus on the new album. Ask about the name. I already know the answer -- an artistic roundabout approach to combating questions about the Strokes, I'm sure. Still, ask anyway. Two minutes until interview. I'm so hungry. I wonder what he's had for lunch, and if he and fiancée Agyness Deyn ate lunch together. Shit, one minute until interview. His dad, Albert Hammond, was just inducted into the Songwriters Hall of Fame. Albert Junior, do you have similar aspirations? How mundane. I bet he’s been asked that question a thousand times. What hasn’t he been asked? Are the Strokes breaking up? Do not ask that question. What’s your favorite color? Boxers or briefs? Fantastic idea, let’s scare him a bit and ask nothing relevant to him as a musician. Albert, if a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound? Let’s discuss. What a great way to lose my job. The phone is ringing, deep breath, act professional ...

Rumor has it: model Agyness Deyn and her Strokes guitarist Albert Hammond Jr. are engaged. The couple have only been together for two months (like a year in celebrity time). If true, get ready for the holy grail of New York hipster weddings. Given that this couple has proven inescapable for anyone strolling on the Bowery, I imagine the omnipresent pair's nuptials might take place at the Bowery Hotel -- everyone in skinny jeans and ironic T-shirts, and the bride distinguishable only her equally ironic veil. A pal says of the couple, "They're really sweet. They basically haven't been apart for more than three seconds in the past two months." So legit! Agyness and Albert are the Axl Rose and Stephanie Seymour of the late-oughts.

You can't seem to get away from model Agyness Deyn these days. I know if you've been on New York's Bowery recently, you've seen her making out with new boyfriend Albert Hammond Jr. Every Brooklyn hipster sports the Agyness haircut. Even her "bandmates" are frustrated by all the attention she's getting. New York band the Five O'Clock Heroes, who asked Deyn sing on their single "Who," are irritated about fielding questions on Agyness rather than their music. Despite the attention generated by having a fast-rising model do guest vocals, lead singer Antony Ellis thinks the plan may have backfired: "Something I do find quite annoying is when there's a photo with Agy and the band, quite often they'll just focus on her and chop our heads off -- even though she's only recorded one song with us." A little advice -- if you want to be front and center in group photos, best not to bring aboard someone who gets their photo taken for a living.

What makes a supermodel? According to Naomi Campbell, "Models need to earn their stripes -- I just think the term [supermodels] is used a little too loosely." Campbell, who's lucky enough to have arguably earned the title, goes on to say that "Kate Moss is obviously a supermodel but after Gisele, I don't think there's been one." The original crop of supermodels includes Cindy Crawford, Linda Evangelista, Christy Turlington, Claudia Schiffer, and of course, Campbell, who dismisses the new crop of popular models like Agyness Deyn and Hilary Rhoda as unworthy of the supermodel tiara. Easy for her to say, all perched high on her glass stilettos and hurling objects at servants.

The year is 1988. Kate Moss has just been discovered and will soon join the ranks of such supermodels as Cindy Crawford, Christy Turlington, and Linda Evangelista. Fashion, however neon-and-spandex laden it may be, is represented by uniquely beautiful women trained to strut, smile, and pose their hearts out. Magazine covers, drugstore makeup ads, couture ads, television commercials—the supermodel rules all. They represent and epitomize glamour and chic, and why not? It’s their job, after all.

While these women are not the first supermodels—just ask Janice Dickinson—theirs will later be referred to as “the era of the supermodel,” “the trinity,” “the union.” They are supermodels perfected, following in the stiletto-clad footsteps of Twiggy, Cheryl Tiegs, Beverly Johnson, and before them Lisa Fonssagrives. Moss will become revolutionary in no time, becoming the shortest model to do runway and the face of the heroin-chic movement that will make the 1990s as seedy-glam as any scene out of Warhol’s factory. Over the next two decades she will represent Calvin Klein, Chanel, Rimmel, Burberry, a top-shelf model representing top-shelf designers.

This has been, like, the worst week for the fashion industry. Ever. Maybe that's wee melodramatic, but consider this: First, we see Janice Dickinson in real life at some party and fear we've stumbled into an avian wax museum. Then, later last week, Whitney wins the title—which, let's face it, means absolutely nothing to anyone—of "America's Next Top Model." It was supposed to be a moment for bigger gals everywhere. And it would have been, I suppose, had Whitney not been such a terrible phony and had she not stomped down the catwalk like Iron Man with two broken arms.

When we heard that model Agyness Deyn was collaborating with Five O'Clock Heroes on "Who," we were worried it might turn out like this. Then we remembered she wasn't a Pussycat Doll.

Yesterday, we reported that model Agyness Deyn was trying her larynx at the warbling word, and today, the not-so-winsome waif has been, well, immortalized. Rootstein mannequins, who will be releasing their Agyness Deyn Mannequin on May 20th, specialize in lifelike clothes hangers. Supermodels Twiggy, Erin O’Connor, and Yasmin Le Bon have all gotten the mann-over too. Find out if these things are anatomically-correct after the jump.

English supermodel Agyness Deyn has collaborated with indie rockers the Five O'Clock Heroes on the single "Who" from the New York band's upcoming album. She sings on the track, which will be released on June 23rd, and there is talk she'll star in the video. Unfortunately, with recent releases that didn't suck from Scarlett and Zooey, we actually can't even make fun of this.