BlackBook Magazine

Eddie Izzard makes his living ‘talking total bollocks.’ But the star of FX’s ‘The Riches’—currently touring a new stand-up act—absolutely hates making lists. (We nudged him.)

1 Nazis
2 Death
3 Rabies
4 Helicopters that don’t work
5 Not being able to turn right on red
6 Extremists

He godfathered the Sex Pistols, partnered with Vivienne Westwood, and got snubbed by Anna Wintour at the Costume Institute Ball on a night he should’ve been knighted. Let's just say, he's earned his right to gripe about a few things in life.

1. I hate airports: They smell like old socks, rotting bodies, and filthy food. The cattle ranch aspects, the airless, timeless, boring sense of death about them. Their pretense at being beacons of knowledge about the cities they are built around. They’re presumptuous and odious products that are supposed to inform us and celebrate the city they fly out of and the cities they fly into. 

2. I hate warm, red wine from California.  I hate the words “Californian zinfandel,” Californian “champagne” (Champagne is a place, a part of France where only champagne can be made.)

He ate people in Sin City, saw dead people in 'Carnivale,' and was eaten (by alligators) in Bully. So how come we find the 28-year-old indie darling so charming? Here, the young thespian tells us what he finds less than adorable.

Nick Stahl’s career began opposite Mel Gibson in The Man Without a Face. Since then, his own brooding visage has become known, most notably in darkly psychological movies, from Larry Clark’s Florida-set, true-crime saga, Bully (in which his sadistic sandwich-maker is murdered by his friends) to the award-winning In the Bedroom, to his fleet-footed cannibal-monster, who collects trophy heads of his female victims in Sin City.

Sci-fi lovers, of course, know him best as the unlikely hero of T3, the third in the Terminator series. The sweetness and sourness came together like perfect salad dressing in HBO’s “Carnivale,” in which his life-giving (and taking) character could be perceived as either Satan or Christ. Sundance isn’t new to him—he’s had films premiere there seven times now—but he returned this year with Sleepwalking (co-starring Charlize Theron) and Quid Pro Quo (with Vera Farmiga). And there’s so much more on his plate, which we hope doesn’t include someone’s hand (see Sin City). Like Lazarus, you can’t keep a good man—or actor—down. —Steve Garbarino

Here’s what the true Mister Hollywood hates about that insufferable place in the merciless sun that fries out your hair, causing nasty split ends. (Blow-dryers are not on this list.)

1. Leaf blowers.
2. Girls who flake when they are supposed to meet you because they forgot about their “friend’s birthday party.”
3. When traffic is so bad you don’t go at a green light.
4. Girls who flake when they “think they are getting sick,” and then you see them later that night at a bar and they say it’s walking pneumonia.
5. The over-kissing of ass of certain movies at awards time.
6. High-waisted pants on girls. Bring back the low-riders; they’ve done nothing wrong.
7. Paparazzi that say “it’s my job.” A crack dealer is a job, too; it doesn’t mean it’s a good one.

The top 20 things she loathes in life.

1. Litterbugs
2. Water wasters
3. New York taxes
4. Air travel
5. Driving to work when it’s still dark
6. McMansion developers
7. The Hollywood system
8. Heroin
9. People who hold open the doors on subways
10. Pollution

The wonderfully unpredictable co-star of Sweeney Todd is expecting her own Rosemary's Baby. So do not mess with her (although we know her littl'un will be quite adorable).

Here is my knee-jerk list of the little things in life that irritate. (I’m pregnant, so basically everything annoys me.) Such as:

1. People-particularly men-saying with surprise, “You’re still drinking caffeine?” as if I’m performing a criminal act on my unborn as I tuck into my treasured one-a-day cup of tea/coffee. Yeah. You try nine months of gestation and self-abnegation before you start censoring my diet. Your mother was probably on vodka, and do you have three heads?

2. People who say, “Is there another in there?,” or, “Wow, you are soooo big!!!” One might not be technically fat, but still “big” does not work for me.

3. People I don’t know who, unsolicited, guess, with absolute conviction, what sex of child I’m going to have. (I have no idea.)

4. Seeing actresses in films and models in catalogues pretending to be pregnant with a solitary neat football of a bump on an otherwise unchanged body. Haven’t they noticed that everything inflates… boobs, bum, legs.

“Curb Your Enthusiasm” star Larry David is not the only one who gets infuriated by life’s minor horrors (stop-and-chats, get-togethers, house tours). His on-air wife Cheryl Hines has a list of her own. Oh, and Larry? Check out Number 9.

Things I hate:

1. Lowriders that show ass crack.
2. Left turns in L.A.
3. Taking off my shoes for airport security.
4. Pennies.
5. Raw onions.
6. Reality shows.
7. Guns.
8. Parking tickets.
9. Crybabies (not to be confused with crying babies).
10. Cancer.

Photo by Christopher Dibble

As the mercurial matriarch on HBO’s 'John from Cincinnati,' she spouts expletives like a seasoned sailor. But in real life, Rebecca DeMornay’s gripes are far less profane.

Photo by Jesse Dylan

1. People who smile or whistle when they’re angry.

2. Any religion, society, or government that doesn’t give women rights and freedom equal to men. Period.

3. The hermetically-sealed packaging of CDs, DVDs, batteries, and even some hotel toothpaste that is physically impossible to unwrap. Apparently, this brings out “package rage” in some people, and I think I suffer from it.

4. Liars like Bush, Cheney and Rumsfeld who sold us the “Weapons of Mass Destruction” fiction, and thereby threw us into the worst military, economic and enemy-making disaster, which nobody knows how we will recover from, or be able to rectify.

Here, the comic’s top 10 things to squawk about.

A tabloid-grabbing divorce from Hollywood cutie-pie Drew Barrymore. Testicular cancer. The Razzie awards. So the City of Angels has not exactly bestowed a guardian upon Tom Green. (Where’s Clarence when you need him?) But if the best comedy is wrought from tragedy, then Green is doing fine. His candid memoir, Hollywood Causes Cancer, was acclaimed for its humor and its heart.

And today he is getting the last laugh, on a nightly basis, with the top-rated internet talk show, Tom Green Live (8 p.m. Pacific Time, www.tomgreen.com). From his Hollywood Hills home studio, famous friends and neighbors like Brooke Shields, Ed McMahon, Val Kilmer, and Thora Birch stop by for an hour of hilarity. And with his feature-length film Prankstar due out later this year, Green is on top of the world, Pa. And yet, and yet…