Noted versifier Edward Westwick -- a.k.a. Chuck Bass on Gossip Girl -- turned in a pre-Thanksgiving bit of poesy on his Facebook page, making good use of the venerable "when you [do x] I'll [do y]" construct popular in the oeuvres of sagacious hermits like the Jonas Brothers and Avril Lavigne. Nevertheless, this particular creative effort provoked a few Facebook responses from Westwick's fellow GG castmembers, all preserved after the jump, along with the full poem. Is "Danii Captain-Crunch Crawford" really Chace Crawford? An impenetrable mystery, just like Westwick's verse.