Leave it to Poor Man's Hilary Duff herself, Hayden Panettiere, to ask the hard-hitting question, "Is luv a game?" And to her we say, yes. But the star of the overlooked cheerleader polemic Bring It On: All or Nothing doth protest too much. She complains about the destructive, anti-Erosian tendency of the media, adding, "People have no idea what they do to people’s relationships. They destroy them." But fails to consider how, despite the lurking tendencies of the paparazzi, there's probably someone on the inside who's leaking all the juicy tidbits to gossip doyennes the world over. A mysterious figure in the shadows. She might wear a mink stole, smoke cigarettes and have a husky voice, like Kathleen Turner after a pack of Marlboro Reds and a few shots of absinthe. But she knows how to keep an otherwise uninteresting celebrity's name glowing in the headlines.

● Hayden Panettiere is dropping towel, as it were, in her new film I Love You, Beth Cooper. Panettiere says, "If I can't flaunt it at 20 ..." [People]
● Who could have known Michael Jackson’s death would be such a big story --, certainly not Us Weekly, or else they wouldn’t have forked over $120K for the exclusive rights to Kendra Wilkinson and Hank Baskett's wedding. [P6]
● Lindsay Lohan says she’s the hardest working person she knows. [PopCrunch]

Chump 1: Hey what's that one show about vampires that was, like, a huge hit?
Chump 2: Oh yeah, the one with that chick with the killer rack?
Chump 1: Yeah! That's it!
Chump 2: Wasn't it inspired by a crappy movie or somethin'?
Chump 1: You betcha!
Chump 2: Aren't people, like, obsessed with vampires right now?
Chump 1: Your mom's obsessed with vampires.

● Brad Pitt reveals he didn’t sign up for Quentin Tarantino’s Inglourious Basterds as much as he got a little drunk and smoked a little something with the director, and wound up shooting weeks later. [Youtube]
● Kate Hudson was seen making out with Alex Rodriguez in the back of a Manhattan restaurant. What is this, junior high? [Foxnews]
● Tori Spelling lets you know what’s in her purse and explains how her BlackBerry is a useful toy for kids. [Myspace]

Well, this won't be pretty. Remember that one time when some jerks decided they wanted to re-do Footloose but couldn't because dearest blessed Zacquisha wanted to pursue more manly roles so as to grow a chest hair or two? And then we all heaved a collective sigh of relief? Well, such joy was short-lived. Because now the casting geniuses have reached their glorious a-ha! in statue-like Chace Crawford.

● Hayden Panettiere is proving her maturity post-breakup with costar Milo Ventimiglia by refusing to be on set with her ex at the same time. No surprise, as their age difference is said to be the cause of the split. [OKMagazine]
● Supermarkets in China are stoking contraception with actresses Mena Suvari and Kelly Brook on the packaging. Get a 12-pack of these celebrity condoms for the economical price of $1.50! [DailyMail]
● NASA has proven they have no sense of humor after refusing to consider Colbert, after Stephen Colbert, as a valid name for their international space station. Colbert suggested the moniker on his show last week and has garnered 115,000 votes. [Yahoo]

Choke is a vulgar film, obscene and obsessive. Sexual addiction, chronic masturbation, colonial theme parks, mental institutions, and one lady's woo woo. Culled straight from the mind of iconoclastic author Chuck Palahniuk, the film is a juggling act of childhood trauma, compulsion, and redemption, all brought to life by first-time director Clark Gregg, and starring the colorful oddball Sam Rockwell. The three of them were recently in New York doing press for the film, and when you're around such depraved individuals, asking the typical, overused junket questions (what was it like working with such and such?) becomes, well, mind-numbing. For Sam, Chuck, and Clark, a different approach was used, and the results were enlightening. Up next, why Clark Gregg wants to be Hayden Panettiere's Siamese twin, why Sam Rockwell wants to live inside Heavy Metal , and why Chuck Palahniuk wants to have sex with a giant panda.