● Sean Penn is set to play Larry in the Farrelly Brothers' Three Stooges adaptation, while Benicio Del Toro has shown interest in starring as Moe, despite the fact that neither man has ever smiled. [Boston Herald]
● Hipster-baiting lines of "ironic" products have hit their nadir: a prototype of Converse shoe-pants created by conceptual artist Sebastian Errazuriz. The final version should feature skinnier jeans. [The L Magazine]
● The creator of the Pez dispenser passed away at age 87. He is survived by thousands of plastic cartoon heads and a stellar Seinfeld episode. [New York Times]
● American Beauty and Revolutionary Road director Sam Mendes will direct the next James Bond flick, deliver Oscar quality scenes of Bond blowing shit up. LA Times

● James Franco will guest star on a January 14th episode of 30 Rock, playing himself. In the teaser photos, he's holding a life-sized anime pillow, but still looking predictably dapper. Tina Fey will likely want to go to there. [Oh La La Mag]
● Vivica A. Fox got teary-eyed on The Monique Show when asked about her tumultuous romance with 50 Cent. She will only call him Curtis and he will only call her to star in his music videos. [ONTD]
● A New York City safety pamphlet is causing a stir with a cool cartoon detailing how to properly shoot heroin! Guaranteed NYC has the hippest, most drug addled government employees of any of the 50 states. [NYPost]

In an op-ed appearing in today’s Wall Street Journal, actor James Franco owns up to his motives for appearing in (count-em!) 20 episodes of the long-running soap General Hospital. For those who thought he’d lost a bet (or his mind), rest assured, Franco is doing just fine. Turns out the stunt was intended as a piece of performance art.

Unless you're one of the seven people in this country currently employed full-time and therefore far away from a television set, you've probably been lounging around your apartment during the day, desultory and shiftless. Busying about in your housecoat with curlers in your hair, day-drinking lukewarm zinfandel, smoking clove cigarettes, and peripherally watching your stories, you've got the makings of a 21st century Edie Beale. You may even take a little time out to periodically prod the cat with a yard stick to get her to stop mewling. That is until yesterday. Yesterday presented a glimpse of Franco on General Hospital. That's when you busted out the catnip. So you could have a 60-minute slice of you-and-James Franco special alone time. Perhaps you even opted to heckle your TV when the camera panned away to the blonde. After a bombastic debut, the actor's reasoning for coming onto the soap suddenly seems unimportant. His arc on the soap means that you can stop feeling bad about being a shut-in and can stop seeking out more enriching pursuits. Sometimes, it's enriching enough to simply support the arts. Franco's first few moments on GH after the break.

No one's entirely sure why James Franco would deign to grace daytime television through a two-month arc on General Hospital. More frustratingly, he remained rather tight-lipped when discussing his motives for his recent penchant for the small-screen with NYMag's Vulture. And finally, a teaser has been made available of his GH arc which promises chills, thrills, and endless moments of ham-handed acting. Moving us to ask, "Why, James Franco, why?"

Performance artist James Franco continues to take any work that comes his way. Sources informed EW that he will guest-star on an upcoming episode of 30 Rock after he dies and comes back to life on General Hospital this November. The show (widely regarded as this generation’s Arrested Development) and its network representatives have declined to comment, but Franco is to be said to shooting the episode this week and at this very moment is RIGHT BEHIND YOU drinking a kind of tea that you have never heard of.

● It’s not April Fool's Day, so I have to assume that James Franco joining the cast of General Hospital is not a joke. [EW]
● There might be a Ramones bio-pic in the works based on the upcoming memoir I Slept With Joey Ramone, written by Joey’s brother. And here’s five reasons why this movie shouldn’t be made. [Billboard, Spin]
● Lady Gaga and Kanye West have cancelled their “Fame Kills” tour, presumably because they took the title of their tour to heart. [AP]

The oh-so-popular book of Elizabeth Gilbert's spiritual adventure through Italy, India, and Indonesia is becoming a movie. The true story begins when Gilbert, a 32-year old accomplished author living in New York, ends up talking to God as she freaks out in her bathroom over her decaying marriage. The marriage ends, the relationship she rebounds with crumbles, and she's left with a gaping depression and a quest for fulfillment. Lucky for her, her publishing house hands her an advance to work her angst out in a book, and she heads off for four month in each of the title countries -- Italy for "Eat," India for "Pray," and Indonesia for "Love."

More on what we briefly noted: Because the creative drought in Hollywood isn't letting up anytime soon, what better time than the present to roll out yet another musician's biopic? Since we've already dispensed with the obligatory Elvis Presley and Johnny Cash flicks and aren't quite ready for a look into Freddie Mercury's life, why not settle on the man who gave capable and unfortunate musicians alike a chance to sing their own "Hallelujah"s?

● Jeff Buckley fans will not only be horrified to learn that there is a biopic in the works, but that Jared Leto, James Franco, and Robert Pattinson are all in the running to play the late singer. [Exclaim]
● Peaches Geldof, 20-year-old divorcee and party girl, says she’s a better role model than Disney mascot Miley Cyrus. [TheSun]
● Megan Fox is all for the legalization of marijuana and doesn’t appreciate that people think she’s a “crazy hippie” for smoking a doobie once in awhile. [KansasCity]