• Good morning! People who are responsible with money have purchased some rhinestone-studded glove that Michael Jackson wore once for about $350,000. [BBC]
• John Mayer has made the claim that celebrity musicians typically make bad records. Stones and a glass house, honey. [DigitalSpy]
• Along those lines: Jennifer Lopez has a new music video out. It is about the thrills of preparing lattice pie crusts, but features close-ups of her lips for no particular reason. [D-Listed]

● John Mayer has a crush, and her name is Taylor Swift. What makes her so attractive? Her humility (take note, Jennifer Aniston). Mayer adds: "Taylor Swift is the last person to know she's Taylor Swift, which I think is totally sweet." [DigitalSpy]
● Here’s a little insight into the world of Victoria Beckham: She usually wears nothing to bed, loves saying that she eats hamburgers, and has nixed self-tanner. [Us]
● Levi Johnston has shot down Sarah Palin’s Oprah-induced Thanksgiving offer saying it was "a nice gesture, but she didn't mean it," and even if she did, it would be totally “awkward.” [People]

● The rumor that Rashida Jones and John Mayer hooked up at the Chateau Marmont is untrue; rather, the two were dining with their friends separately. Mayer did come over to Jones’ table to say hello and asked to play the guitar her friends had brought for an impromptu concert. [GossipCop]
● Despite actor Matthias Schweighöfer telling German GQ otherwise, Jude Law and Robert DeNiro are not in Kenneth Branagh’s Thor. [LatinoReview]
● Kenny Ortega has left the Footloose remake after the studio wanted to cut his budget and have the film be a drama with very few musical numbers, rather than the musical extravaganza Ortega wants it to be. [JustJared]

● Did you hear Lamar Odom and Khloe Kardashian aren’t really married? Oh wait, yeah they are. [TMZ, People]
● Speaking of the wedded couple, OK! isn’t too happy with them after having to fork over an additional $50,000 (on top of their $250,000 for exclusive wedding photos) in order to buy back the paparazzi shots of the couple. [NYPost]
● It only took one day for the "Free Roman Polanski" backlash to happen; although filmmakers like Woody Allen, David Lynch, and Martin Scorsese are for his release, French director Luc Besson and the Polish Prime Minister think that the man who made Chinatown isn’t above the law. [Timesonline]

● The editor of Elle UK, Lorraine Candy, doesn’t know if September covergirl Lindsay Lohan will ever be featured in her magazine again, calling Lilo’s shoot “unpredictable” and “confusing” with the cover girl pulling multiple disappearing acts. [NYDailyNews]
● Now that 90210 and Melrose Place have successfully risen from the grave, will the CW be resurrecting Dawson’s Creek? [TheWrap]
● John Mayer keeps it classy in a Hugh Hefner-esque velvet smoking jacket while dining with his mother; sadly, she fell in front of the paps, or maybe that was the plan? [I’mNotObsessed]

● Despite internet rumors, Jeff Goldblum did not plummet to his death on a film set in New Zealand; he’s alive and well in Los Angeles. [Stuff]
● Celebs like Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dane Cook, and John Mayer did what any sensible person would do and expressed their grief for Michael Jackson’s death via Twitter. [TMZ]
● Madonna is so devastated by the news of Michael Jackson’s passing that she hasn’t stopped crying. [People]

Please note how I said "when hell freezes over". Last I checked, the sun was still shining broadly over the land and the air was thick and muggy enough to crush flowers. Even down by the Styx. So it's really no surprise that perpetual thorny weed Perez Hilton's still braying about a tiff that occurred two nights ago -- which in Hollywood standard time skews closer to four weeks. But some things of note have happened since Hilton bemoaned his bruised eye and told his side of the story via webcam. Most notably: GLAAD has laid a proper smackdown on him, demanding an apology for his venomous deployment of "faggot" against will.i.am. But much like Veruca Salt, Hilton wants the whole effing world and would sooner demand an apology from GLAAD for originally demanding an apology from him than be decent. His side of the story: "I am saddened GLAAD chose to victimize me further by criticizing me for how I non-violently dealt with a very scary situation that, unfortunately, turned violent." My side of the story: I'm saddened that Perez Hilton chose to victimize me by refusing to sink to the bottom of the D-list dustbins like the pop goss flotsam he is.

For the love of Gina G., is it 1997 again? It was fine when the Spice Girls did the whole comeback thing because they were arguably The Beatles of their heyday. Also they looked quite good coming back for one last can-can. It was also fine when Robyn came back, because she waxed reflective on her past as a tween poppet. I'm even willing to grant clemency to Take That, Kim Wilde, and All Saints. Those were welcome flashbacks to a golden part of pop's past. But there's an incongruous trio of pop zombies that make us scratch our heads, look back at the '90s and ask why. As in, why should we humor Dave Matthews Band when we already have John Mayer?

●Jamie Foxx might clinch the role of Frank Sinatra in the upcoming Martin Scorsese bio-pic over Johnny Depp, Leonardo Dicaprio, and Harry Connick Jr. because “cool is colorblind” [PopCrunch]
●John Mayer cementing his D-bag/Lothario status by stumbling out a club Saturday night covered head to chest in red-lipstick kisses from no doubt his countless admirers. [Dlisted]
●Despite making millions of people laugh in films like Zoolander and Night at the Museum, Ben Stiller doesn’t find himself particularly funny. [Showbizspy]

From the Maniston mothership of banality comes news of John Mayer vowing to give up Twitter. Decries the sensitive singer-songwriter-public irritant, "Twitter is silly and dumb!" You hear that sizzling? That's the sound of racks of servers nearly short-circuiting, trying to handle the flurry of excited Twitterers, all abuzz from the idea of a Mayerless Twitterverse. This after Jennifer Aniston dumped him over his infatuation with the overshare generator. But it seems that Mayer's self-imposed Twitter ban is, at best, fleeting.