Ever since culture became commoditized, savvy entrepreneurs have taken successful foreign trends (Kombucha!), put a slight spin on them, and managed a tidy profit off domestic audiences -- without so much as a hat-tip to the original. But something about days which force even Wall Streeters to become new-age storagistas make the latest uptick in this trend seem especially dire. Even the early 1990s' ill-conceived stab at a mildly sensuous filmic adaptation of Super Mario Bros. didn't reek of such desperation. It's not that people didn't rip off ideas during sunnier times (American Idol! The Office! Mariah Carey!), but those rip-offs were at least a little palatable. There's something patently heartbreaking about trying to watch Molly Shannon and Selma Blair forcefully banter their way through the paper bag that is the Americanized Kath & Kim. And if that particular rehash was a sign of things to come, I regret not purchasing a timeshare on a Gawker-less vacuum in the middle of nowhere (Idaho!) when I had my chance. But in case you need a little goading, consider these spectacularly frightening carbon copies of once-lovable pop songs and TV shows that influential types will be trying to jam through your frontal lobes in the months to come.