The Empire State Building hosts weddings only once a year, on February 14, and it's not a first-come first-served kind of deal. Nope, you're going to have to work for it. For V-Day 2010, The Empire State Building has partnered with The Knot so that 14 lucky couples will be able to say (or renew) their vows and get hitched (or re-hitched) on the very top of the building while the tower blazes red, pink, and white in honor of cupid and his arrow of love. Awwwwwwwwww.

Former Governor Spitzer's famed call girl seems to be taking a page from Kanye West's book -- that of aspiring towards Fashion Week ubiquity. First Ashley Dupre turned up at Yigal Azrouel on Friday; her unexpected appearance not only caught the eye of countless publications, it came as a shock to Azrouel (whose publicist Kelly Cutrone of Peoples Revolution had invited the former prostitute to a different Fashion Week presentation). In fact, the designer was so taken aback he subsequently fired Cutrone for "mismanagement." But it seems the show wasn't the only Fashion Week event on Dupre's social calendar this week.

In such far-flung places as Guatemala and Finland, February 14 isn't a day for all legally-bound lovers (ha ha, suckers!) to show off their ability to ensnare a mate while the rest of us suffer, sublimating our hysterics with disco fries. It's not a day one takes time out to offer respects to martyred saints. But to those friends who, when you need a shoulder to cry on, are ready with a bottle of Merlot -- or those friends who, when you needed advice about what to do now that you've lost your job, are also ready with a bottle of Merlot. That said, gifting a bundle of poppies is only the icing on the cake that is Friendship Day. If you're looking to shirk the faintest mention of the V-word and anti-parties won't cut it for you in New York (where Valentine's syndrome can be especially devastating), treat your besties to a round at these hideouts.

Whether you were planning on enjoying a delightful singles' staycation by drawing a bath and listening to Tori Amos' Under the Pink or thinking about lovingly cramming burgers into your paramour's mouth while humming "Afternoon Delight" to the visible discomfort of nearby diners, Valentine's Day no doubt maintains a chokehold on your heart, no matter how large or little it is. And this year, it seems our favorite celebrities -- beacons of hope and faith like Teri Hatcher and that other quite-talented Amy Winehouse soundalike -- share our plebian sentiments about this dreadful day (and let's not kid ourselves, that's exactly what it is).

If you're like me (and for your sake I hope you are not) and you're always trying to be "different," Valentine's is always the premier day to showcase just how "different" you are. It's the biggest chance you'll get all year to think outside the box of chocolates. I'm talking, of course, about what kind of gift you get. You're expected to lavish your Other in gifts of the romantic type -- generally things that smell perfumey or sweet, or maybe some sexy undergarments or jewelery. So played. You know what your bf or gf really want on Valentine's Day? Three juicy burgers, obviously.

February 14 is coming. Hearts, candies, and overpriced prix-fixe menus, and lucky for you, several Anti-Valentine's Day events to get sloshed at (and perhaps find a partner to take home to properly hate on the fake holiday). Here are five spots to take a piss on love.

1. Village Pourhouse (Greenwich Village) - There's a party going on after 10 p.m. called the "Ex-orcism Party." Bring a photo of your ex and take your turn taping their mug to the dart board. If you hit bull's eye, you win an hour of free open bar.
2. The Sunburnt Cow (East Village) - The second annual "No Love at the Cow" kicks off at 6 p.m. $20 gets you two hours of an open bar, and plenty of chances to mingle with the other singles at the bar.

Valentine's Day can be nightmarish enough when it's not in such close proximity to Friday the 13th -- which is bad news for all you procrastinators -- so try to keep your luck in play with a few tips from romance and sex expert Ethan Imboden, founder of the imaginatively seductive site JimmyJane.com. He's got some suggestions on gift ideas to "turn it up a notch this Valentines' Day."

Breakin' up may be hard to do in the best of circumstances, but calling it quits before Valentine’s Day is in a league of discomfort all its own. Avoiding an awkward situation is key, but as matchmaker extraordinaire Amy Laurent points out -- “breaking up via email, text message or even over the phone shows cowardice and immaturity.” With that in mind, here’s a list of spots that make breaking up right before Valentine’s Day just a wee bit easier (or at least more survivable).

10. Rick’s Cabaret & Steakhouse (Garment District) - Soothe the blow by offering to buy your ex a lap dance.
9. Bagatelle (Meatpacking District) - So loud no one will notice your yelling match.
8. Go see He’s Just Not That Into You - Blame it on the eye-opening film.