“I’m in da toilet! Call me back in five?” A clicking sound signals the end of my call to Ari Up of the Slits. Three decades after forming the all-female punk- and reggae-infused band at the age of 14, she hasn’t smoothed any of her charming rough edges. When the Slits released their debut album Cut in 1976, they plotted the downfall of the Queen with the Sex Pistols and their rowdy cohorts. They inspired everyone from Boy George to Cher. When they first started getting radio play, hosts refused to utter the band’s name. Still, the Slits’ recognition and legacy has been minimal at best. After disbanding in the 1980s, Ari moved to Borneo where she lived with a local tribe. She later relocated to Kingston, Jamaica, where she has become a dreadlocked dancehall legend known as Medusa. Here, the outsider’s outsider discusses her decision to re-form the Slits and release this month’s Trapped Animal, while considering her deadly Jamaican routine, and why Madonna and Lady Gaga owe her big.

For every one glass of sake poured in America, we knock back 160 glasses of wine. That proportion is changing, though. Sake imports have doubled over the past decade, with vodka the only drink that’s growing faster. Those looking for a crash course in the rice libation can find a huge one at the Joy of Sake tasting this Thursday, September 24th. Webster Hall will do the hosting, with your ticket purchase opening up three floors of partying. Some 270 premium sakes will be poured, almost half of them otherwise unavailable outside of Japan.

Tiffany Gong and Christina Rodriguez are fashion freelancers and jewelry designers for their line, Triskaidekaphobia (which means fear of the number 13) by day and the Six Six Sick girls by night. After hosting a Tuesday night party at New York’s Happy Ending bar, the girls started a following full of fashion panache and eccentric party-goers. Their current gigs include heading up private events and weekly parties at the Tribeca Grand and Webster Hall, BEast . They'll be throwing a Chictopia fashion week event at BEast this evening, and will have a night at Butter starting Friday, September 25th.

Tom Dunkley and Alejandro Torio of GBH have established their brand over a dozen years by consistently producing a party which pushes the envelope of music to a hip, interesting, and interested crowd. They aren't promoters supporting a night at a club but directors who create a weekly event. Their Saturdays at the Tribeca Grand sink the great lie that there is nothing to do in this town. Nightlife is as vibrant and relevant as ever -- it just doesn't live in one space every night. There may not be a true great club at this time, but there are great parties every single night of the week. For instance, tonight I am visiting Emma Cleary at her "Don't Feed the Models Party" at Katra, James Coppola's "Cool Jerk" soiree at Sin Sin, Mey Bun's birthday bash, "Monarch Mondays" at Above Allen, and then to the Jane for Greg Lucas' birthday gathering. I may even stop at the still fabulous Butter to say hey to the fast-lane crowd.

The Roxy, an iconic club once described as "the Studio 54 of roller rinks," ran rings around it's competition from the 1970's until 2007. An attempted relaunch has been the subject of much behind-the= scene action featuring former owner Gene Dinino, who yesterday broke off negotiations with a group headed up by his former corporate events planner Neal Erman. Neal's group had the money and ability to obtain a liquor license while Gene--who operated the joint from 1985 until its close--was in good standing with the landlord Mendy Taffel. Thousands of dollars per week separated the 2 parties, and yesterday it got ugly. Neal's group has "spent 6 figures on soundproofing consultants and other planning" as they tried to dot all the i's and cross all the t's, approaching yesterdays community board meeting.

I awoke to the sound of CNN blaring great economic news to my Martinez Brothers-blown ears. Cielo is winding down its summer programming, and as reported earlier will close August 1 until September by court order. The Martinez Brothers are no longer the new kids on the block and seem destined to become legends before they reach 21 years of age. As I write this, the good people over at Pacha are awaiting a decision by Judge Joan Madden regarding the fate of the last mega-house club this town can boast. I have heard unsubstantiated rumors of economic troubles over at M2, and to me, Webster Hell is not a consideration. Home and Guesthouse just shuttered under the weight of enforcement, and the question "who's next?" looms large. Is it a coincidence this latest round of crackdowns by the powers that be is happening just as an economic recovery is waking me and the whole country up?

Okay, so: we were wrong about Jay-Z. Mr. Carter probably needed to rest up for his big All Points West headlining show today, and was a no-show on stage at last night's Diesel Party. That being said, if you didn't go, you missed a few things, chief among them: Lykke Li performing with The Roots, sharing a drum solo with drummer ?uestlove. Oh, and: Kanye West practically detonating Webster Hall when he flew on stage with the Clipse to perform their new joint collaboration "Kinda Like A Big Deal" live for the first time. It was, uh, kinda like a big deal. And we've got video of both, after the jump.

Jay-Z headlines All Points West in front of a crowd of thousands on Friday night in Liberty State Park -- it's going to be one of his biggest stateside performances ever. Thursday night, the big summer Diesel party goes down at Webster Hall, with The Roots, Passion Pit, and Drake. And we're pretty sure Jay-Z (and Lykke Li) gonna stop in. Here's why.

Cielo, one of the two remaining iconic house music clubs, will be closed for the month of August for violation of a court -ordered stipulation. This stipulation required the club to search everyone who entered the premises. Cielo staff failed to search a member of a team of undercover police who, according to sources, have been "tasked to violate specific nightclubs." This police team is made up of "members of both narcotics and vice, and it was such a team involved with the Sean Bell tragedy." A source told me "undercover police teams are buying bottles at clubs all over town," and these officers are "specifically looking for narcotics sales involving club promoters and security." Another source added, "the police can gain entry to clubs where they previously would have trouble getting past the doorman by buying bottles; they use fines from violations to pay for the table."

Dining might be the new nightlife, so then where does that leave nightlife? Could nightlife be the new shopping? Could it be still alive and well, and hiding behind a bandolier of dusty velvet ropes? Our dear Foster's existential breakdown and subsequent pocketbook damage got me to thinking about what everyone else (re: people with jobs other than chronicling New York nightlife) is doing with their free time in Manhattan. I cornered a Wall Street Dude, a New York Newbie, a Hipster DJ, a girl-about-town Socialite, a Fashion Intern, and a Lawyer to see what's going on behind our editorial backs. Turns out actually going someplace isn't a precursor for strong opinions, pro or con. For example:

WALL STREET DUDE
So, what do you think is hot these days in nightlife?
Minetta Tavern.